LONeLINESS: The Secret to Forgetting
by Saiyuri of the Red Shadow
Summary: Sai has left on a secret mission. Unable to tell his fragile lover of his leaving, the young kitsune falls into a state of depression until the person he thought he'd never see again returns. What fate awaits our blue eyed kitsune?
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Hello lovely people! I'm so happy that people like my first one-shot, that I decided to continue it. This is going in a direction that I'm not entirely sure of so suggestions are much appreciated. Enjoy darlings!

* * *

Sai sat up on the bed carefully, as not to wake the blonde sleeping beside him. He had been assigned a mission today one that would keep him away from his blonde lover for at least a month. It was classified so he couldn't even tell Naruto that he was leaving. He stood silently. The night air was calm and quiet. The Moon made it seem as though the village was glowing.

_'I'll come back soon, my angel. Please don't worry for me'_

And then he was gone.

* * *

_"Sasuke?" Naruto whispered, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. But the raven was nowhere to be found. _

You've never been the type to just sit still.

_Naruto dressed quickly, and followed his lovers chakra through the dark streets of Konohona. _

Or think things out before acting

_"You shouldn't have followed me, Naruto." Sasuke said sadly. He hoped that the kit, _his kit_, would've stayed sleeping._

But I never thought

_"What's going on, Sasuke?"_

That you could

_"I'm leaving Naruto. Please don't try to stop me. If you do I can't promise that I won't hurt you."Naruto's face fell._

Hurt me like this

_" Sasuke, please don't do this. If there's anything I could do please I'll do it!" Tears poured down his face as the cool October wind blew past them. Sasuke's face hardened._

All I've ever wanted

_"This isn't about you Naruto! It never was! I have to avenge my clan."_

Was_..._

_" But please...Sasuke you don't have to go please. I'll give you my power just please..." He was getting desperate.  
_

To be loved...

_"Someone like you who never had a family couldn't understand." _

By someone

_" But Sasuke" He threw himself into the raven haired shinobi's arms._

Anyone

_"I'm sorry." The kunai sank into the kit as he fell to his knees. _

Am I not good enough?

_"Sa-su..." The world faded into black_

Is this the fate of someone so hated as I?

_Sasuke was gone and the kitsune bleed, to heartbroken to open his eyes._

Sasuke...

* * *

A/N: Well that's it kiddies. Tell me is it good? Bad? Ugly? Give me all the gory details in the form of a review(or Naruto will never find true happiness)!!!!


	2. Authors Note

Okay guys I'm so really _really_ sorry about my updates (or lack there of) recently. I mean it's not as bad as the entire year where I abandonded my fan fiction but it's still pretty damn bad and I feel I owe you guys an explanation:

A few days ago my cousin died. She was really sick and the doctors kept misdiagnosing her and couldn't do much for her at the end so she pretty much died due to their incompetence, which sickens me. I flew down South to go to her memorial service in two days so I probably won't be online to often let alone updating because:

1. My mom's not feeling well

2. I have to watch my little brother

3. I have to spend more time with my family

So you guys probably won't here much from me for a while but rest assured I am working on all of stories depite the dark cloud that has placed itself over my life at the moment. Any spare moment I get I'm either working on Mistakes, Betrayl, and LONeLINESS: The Secret to Forgetting or my own novel. All of you who update really brighten my day and give me so much inspiration. Thank you so much for all your support.

After my family crisis I probably won't be updating till well after September 18, when I get my new laptop, because I'll be going back to school. But I won't let October pass by without updating atleast one story. I promise (maybe).

-Saiyuri of the Red Shadow


	3. Chapter 2

A/N: HAPPY NEW YEAR! I'm back with the first official chapter of dun dun dun _LONeLINESS ^.^_. I'm sorry it took so long but I had (and still have) a lot of ideas about how to write this and was going through a difficult time with school and family... Most of it's better now so that's great... Anyway READ AND ENJOY!!_  
_

* * *

_Sakura eyed Naruto worriedly. It had been two weeks since Sasuke left and the blonde just wasn't the same. He didn't smile as much (more like at all) . He didn't laugh __at all (well, not with humor any way). His eyes weren't as bright (they'd lost their joyful spark). Hell, he even breathed differently (almost like it hurt)!_

_Everything in the village seemed to cause him pain, especially those who lived there. They all blamed him for "corrupting" Sasuke with his "evil". It had gotten so bad that the blonde only left his apartment to train (even though Kakashi-sensei was nowhere to be found) and even that was only sometimes._

_"Sakura, what's wrong?" He asked softly, breaking the rosette out of her reverie. She smiled._

_'Idiot, how can he care so much?'_

_"Nothing I'm just worried about you. You haven't been the same since..." But she couldn't finish. Saying that Sasuke had left... out loud... just made it too real. As long as she kept it her mind neither of them would ever have to admit it._

_"Don't worry Sakura, I'm fine." His smile was forced. Words too sweet. None of it reached his eyes._

_'Naruto.' She thought sadly._

_"I'm fine, really." His tone left no room for arguments so Sakura let it be._

_"Okay." _

* * *

The blonde opened his eyes slowly, letting them adjust to the morning light pouring in through the window. Sai wasn't home, but the blonde didn't mind. He was probably out training somewhere.

_'Maybe he'll bring me some ramen.'_He stretched, rolling around under the blankets. When he came back they could eat ramen together like they used to... He shook his head willing the thoughts away. They barely had anytime together since Danzo became hokage...

He took a deep breath, ignoring the sharp pain in his chest. If it had been hard for him before to live in the village, then now it was terrible. After saving the village from Pein and giving his all to help rebuild his village; his home. Danzo had taken the first chance he got to put special restrictors on his chakra flow, making him unable to act as a ninja. He spoke fervently of the "danger" he posed to village, reminding everyone of what they'd lost at the demon's hand. Had it not been for Sai, Naruto would be wasting away in prison by now.

_'Sai'_

_**/Why you worry for that mortal scum alludes me, kit/**_

_(Don't be mean, he takes good care of me, he's my lover)_

_**/There has to be love for him to be anything but a bed mate/**_

_(Kyuubi... you know Sai loves me, please don't say things like that)_

There was silence for a moment, until the demon growled fiercely through there link.

**_/If he loves you so much than where is he?/_**

_(...)_

**_/That's what I thought/_**

Naruto shut off the link, ignoring the kitsune's indignant cries and obvious rage at being shut out; he didn't have the energy to deal with her negativity today, more energy was being drained through the restrictors than usual. He was starting to feel dizzy and light headed, the room was spinning and he'd barely even sat up yet.

_'Sai'_

Then he gave into the darkness.

* * *

Danzo smiled, relishing in the power flowing through him. I had taken a while to perfect the technology, and many... guinea pigs, had found theirs live at an end on his examination table. But it was all worth it to ensure the safety of the village... and the advancement of his own powers didn't hurt either. After all Naruto was a very powerful, determined young ninja who didn't always think things through. It would've been irresponsible for him to allow the boy that much freedom and power when he went out doing only Kami knows what. And there wasn't a doubt in Danzo's mind that he would've destroyed the village had he been given the chance.

_'Especially with training from that damned Jiraiya and those foolish little toads.'_

But the jinchūriki wouldn't be a problem anymore.

"Danzo-sama, your guest has arrived." He nodded.

"Thank you, Dajimu. You are excused." Dajimu bowed deeply and silently departed. Within seconds, it seemed, another ninja was in his place. This man was tall with black hair, eyes, and a cocky air about him.

"Danzo-sama, eh? Think you're worth that title?" He quipped, Danzo smirked.

"I deserve it more than you do traitor." The man chuckled at this.

"Always the charmer." He paused for a moment, studying him," So... Danzo, what do you need from me?" His smirked widened.

"I need you to break someone for me." The man raised an eyebrow at this, his interest piqued.

"Really now? And who exactly has brought your wrath upon themselves?"

"Naruto, Uzumaki Naruto." His eyes widened in shock.

"The jinchūriki?" Danzo nodded smugly.

"Why you're not up to it?" He looked at Danzo with mock hurt.

"Tsk, tsk, Dan-Dan you know I'm always up for a challenge."

* * *

_Sakura shifted nervously next to the dark haired nin, opening and closing her mouth, trying to get the words out. He turned to look her, his dark eyes unreadable._

_"What is it?" She blushed brightly and looked down. _

_"Well, Sai... I was wondering... if you could, maybe, check on Naruto later? I mean he's been depressed ever since," she smiled sheepishly," Sasuke-"_

_"The traitor."_

_"- left," she ignored his interjection," but it's gotten worse recently and he doesn't even leave his house anymore to train... So we've been worried about him..." She trailed off not meeting his eyes._

_"We?" _

_"Me, his friends." Sai nodded._

_"I'll go see what I can do." _

* * *

_Naruto lay curled up at his side feeling lonely and betrayed. He sobbed softly._

_Five years_

_Four months_

_Three weeks_

_Six Days_

_Ten hours_

_Forty-two minutes_

_That was how long Sasuke had been gone and the hurt just wouldn't stop. Naruto couldn't think of any reason Sasuke would have to leave him. He had promised- no he had sworn to never to leave the blonde. But that wasn't even the worst part._

_He'd left on his birthday._

_His birthday the one day of the year when every villager be they man, women, or child, were relentless in their abuse of him. Another choked sob._

_"Naruto are you in here?" Naruto sat up and wiped off his face. He couldn't let anyone know he'd been crying._

_" Naruto." Sai whispered. His face was completely expressionless as he grabbed Naruto's hand and looked into his deep blue eyes. They were red and puffy from all the crying he'd done. _

_"Let go of me!" Naruto cried pushing Sai away. The apathetic ninja didn't budge._

_" I said-!" Sai pressed his lips against Naruto's softly. He closed his eyes and forced his chakra into Naruto, calming the young Kitsune. Naruto closed his eyes and leaned into the kiss, tears pouring down his face. Sai pulled away slowly and wrapped his arms around him.  
_

_"If you ever need help forgetting him just call me. I'll give you everything he wasn't man enough to give you." Naruto leaned into his chest; it felt warm_

_"Sai." A kiss softer than a summer's breeze was pressed against his lips._

_"I can make you forget."_

* * *

Sasuke sat beneath a waterfall, clearing his mind of all was much easier to focus like this. No distractions, no attachments, just the rush of water filling him, drowning his consciousness, refining his clarity. Meditation in that place gave him so much peace and took away all of his worries.

-Worries? Who are you kidding Sa-kun? You never _worry_ about anything-

Except that minor annoyance. The voice in the back of his head that destroyed any kind of peace he could possibly have. It questioned his every action, criticized him relentlessly for even the smallest mistakes, everything was fair game for it.

-If you didn't make it so easy I wouldn't bother you. But someone so** fucking** stupid deserves to be punished, isn't that what you thought about blondie-

"Enough!" The raven cried, punching a thick slab of rock. His pale fist ached and bled but the pain was a welcome relief...

- Bleeding doesn't make you suffer, Sa-kun -

* * *

"Sai, are you in position?"

"Hai. Fū, Hyō; has the target been apprehended?" The communicator buzzed in his ear

"No, Ryona Kisa, is still at large." Sai's lips were set in a thin line, the closest he'd get to a facial expression with his squad members. Ryona Kisa was, even in the politest way a speaking, a pain in the ass. Not only was she more powerful than even Tsunade could ever hope to be, she was also the most wicked creature to slither out of the leaf village since Orochimaru.

"Sai-kun! Fū-chan! Hyō-san! Did you already give up?" Her sugary sweet voice seemed to come from the trees, it poured out of the branches and bounced of every pebble. He had no chance of hearing the petite figure coming behind him.

"If you all give up," she giggled," I'll just have to kill you!" Coal eyes widened as a kunai was forced through his neck. Kisa giggled once more, thoroughly amused by the gurgling noises the raven haired-nin made while the life poured out of him. She leaned in close to him and whispered in his ear," This is your punishment for all that you've done."

And then there was darkness.

* * *

A/N: Well that's all for chapter 1 folks

Shikon Entity Shinobu: kya. pwease write more. It's the best yaoi I've ever read Kaiya-chan. and if you don't update *face darkens* I know where you go to school...I think.

_Don't worry I will be writing this for a while and of course it's the best yaoi you've ever read I wrote it __;)__ *giggles evilly* And sweetness, even if you did know where I went to school you wouldn't be able to hurt me. You're so cute when you think you're tough __^.^ _

littlesnowfarie2005: glad you are making this out of a story not a one shot

_Yeah that wouldn't be fair if i just left it as a one shot ^.^ Keep readin' okay?_

zero434: update! i wanna a update!

_Looks like you got you're wish, eh?_

: TT_TT i cried

_Aww *hugs* don't worry things'll get better for Naruto...maybe. I'm glad my writing made you feel something though that really makes my day._

hiya couldn't find a name: IS NARU-CHAN GONNA WAKE UP AN SEE SAI-KUN LEAVING IT'LL BREAK HIS HEART! btw I LOVE YOU!^^

_Nope but worse things are going to (and have already) happen to Naruto. Aww, you love little 'ole me *blushes* you keep on leaving reviews like that I'll dedicate a few chapters to you ^-^_

uzumaki misaki: is this a one-shot or is there more?

_Oh don't worry there's much more than one chapter here._

PrincessAyla1994: Sasuke sucks Orichy's balls. He can't understand what he's leaving behind. Poor Naru, write soon please.

_LOL, he sure does. But don't worry he'll realize it soon enough, but Naru's going to have to suffer a lot more at first. I'll try to update as soon as possible._

_A/N: Thanks for reading and all your support, I'll try to have the next chapter up before March but if life gets in the way then I'll try to make the next chapter extra long, K? See ya later ^^  
_


End file.
